Friday, April 11, 2014

Men Taking Up Too Much Space On The (Taxi)


Excuse me sir, does your leg HAVE to touch mine?  Yes?  Ok, keep yelling into your cellphone and staring at me.  It's cool.

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

An Open Letter to my Neighborhood Cats

Inspired by this post and this charmer:


Dear Cats,

I understand your appreciation of the fact that I have both a front and back balcony that are level with the tin roofs you frequent.  That, however, does not mean you can use my house as a shortcut to get from one balcony to the other, as you give me your haughtiest look.  I f*cking live here.  Get out.

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

La Boda

My host sister, Kimberlin, got married a little over a week ago.  She has been talking about it for a while now, but suddenly sprung the date on me a little more than a week before the fact, so I had to rush from a meeting in Managua to be sure I was there for it.  There was no way I could miss it, and I'm so glad I didn't.


As soon as I stepped off the bus, I ran into my sister-in-law, Olga, and niece, Dayana, as they were picking up Dayana's little bride's dress from the seamstress.  Instead of flower girls and ring bearers, the tradition is to have "little brides and grooms" who will dress up like mini versions of the actual bride and groom, and lead the procession into the church.  We all went to Olga's house where I changed into my dress, and Dayana into hers.

Notice all the bags of corn they have piled in the living room.  It is my host brother's new business endeavor - buying corn from the farmers, then transporting and selling it in Managua.
All dressed up.
I walked Dayana to my host family's house where everyone was still getting ready, even though the wedding party was supposed to be at the church in half an hour.  It was chaos, with most of my family still in their towels, running around, fighting over who would take a bucket bath next, and cooking all at the same time.

The neighbors and my cousin, cooking up vats of beef stew.

Jerson, all bathed, and ready to dress up as the little groom.
 About an hour after the supposed starting time, Kim was ready to head to the church, though everyone was teasing her at this point, saying that her groom had gotten tired of waiting, and left.
The procession
The wedding usually starts with a procession from the bride's house to the church.  It is usually walked, but my family was being their best, and took their car instead.  I should mention that this is the only occasion I have seen them drive this car.  Ever.

Can everyone just stop and recognize how badass Jerson is?
Coolest five year-old I know.
The ceremony involved a full mass, and instead of exchanging only vows and rings, it is tradition for the couple to be looped together with a garland, and for the groom to give the bride coins as a representation of his promise to provide for her...I'll leave my thoughts on the overt machismo of that practice aside for now.

My host mom, Doña Esperanza, with the little brides and groom.

All the girls I love: Danelia, my host sister; Yami, host cousin, Olga and Vanessa, both host sister-in-laws.
 After mass, (presided by the ever awesome Padre Cornelius) we walked back to my host family's house for the reception.  But not before Kim switched shoes with her mom, since she couldn't stand to be in her high heels for one more second.
The walk back home for the reception.
The rest of the night, I put my camera away, and danced like fool with the women of my family in our coconut tree-filled patio until about 1 in the morning when the sound system guys packed it up for the night. 
By that time, Dayana and Jerson were passed out next to each other on the couch, and out of town relatives had put their mats and blankets down on the ground to sleep, since we were out of sleeping space in beds. We hung around eating, drinking, and talking until around 2am, and then I assumed everyone was done partying for a while.  I should have known better.  When I went back to the house in the morning, my host brothers and their friends were still going at it.  Some more so than others.

This guy.  He started snoring not long after I took this.